You Don’t Have to Understand Someone to be Kind to Them

I’d like to respond to a recent letter to the editor Transgender Movement is Offensive to Women. I usually don’t read the letters, but when a quarter of the page is taken up with hate speech, it’s hard to ignore. This author felt compelled to vilify a marginalized group of people on behalf of “all women”. I am a cys woman and I have no agenda other than that I am extremely offended by her vitriol.

Let me make a few things clear: 1) there is no “transgender movement”. As the LGBTQIA+ community has slowly gained more rights, the rest of the public is finally catching up and learning about segments of this community. And, unfortunately, some politicians are stoking the flames of the ignorant in an effort to have those rights taken away. 2) What do you care? How is it really impacting you? You mention that you don’t want them “sauntering around with [their] genitals swinging from side to side” but let me ask you, why are you looking at people’s genitals in a public restroom? That’s much creepier than a trans person using the toilet, which, by the way, should be a basic human right.

It seems to me that you would benefit from broadening your knowledge on the topic beyond what you hear on Fox News. I highly recommend “This Book is Gay” by Juno Dawson, which is a sort of manual for parents and friends who want to understand this community better. Or if that’s too liberal, read “The Secrets of My Life” by Caitlin Jenner.

Trans people are not villains. They are people having to live in a binary society and navigating hateful and often violent attacks—they are just trying to live their life. And if you don’t understand them, remember: you don’t have to understand someone to be kind to them.

–Goldy Bardin, Castro Valley